Fiction

The Day We Cornered Happiness In The Back Alley

Santa-Cruz-Cowboy,-California

We cornered happiness in the back of the alley behind the pub Ambivalence and we said “stick Em up.” But happiness was quicker in the draw and shot us in the leg. After physical therapy we hung up fliers around town: Happiness, we’re coming to getcha, ya hear? “Happiness quivered in its boots” was how we…

The Ballad of The Mosquito and the House Fly

Mosquito and Housefly

At a BBQ early today somebody brought Nickel Nips. Do you know what Nickel Nips are? Even if you think you don’t, yes, you do. Remember these little guys from your sweet tooth teething childhoods? Anyways, I twisted two together and put them in a tree, because… that’s just the sort of stuff you do…

Constipated With Love

Cliffs of Maher

A few years back I was dating a girl and we did not agree on acceptable levels of flatulence in our lives. I felt that within the confines of our own apartments, a few accidental vapor babies every hour or so was fine. But we did not smell nose to nose on this. She noticed…

Fiction: Nursing Home Rhapsody

Old Haggily People

I learned while visiting my Gpas nursing home that the gender ratio for single men in their 80s is many women vying for widowers like Custer made his last stand. My Kenyan brothers taught me never to race them again.  Nursing Home Rhapsody   “How’d you like…!” Floyd paused, trying to remember what he was…

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